March 8th, 2006


AAA! Is Like Gamugha! Make-Love Is Like Gamugha, For Make Newfeller!

(Rated PG-13 for sexual content. Reader discretion is advised)

Let's get this out of the way, I'm a prude. Plus I'm a virgin. I don't go around telling people how they should live their lives, that's up to them, but I've always been curious about sex. Not so much the act (well, okay, yeah, the act), but what it means for a person.

Matt's point about losing virginity being like a coming of age made me think. Mostly why is it that every time some one loses their virginity, it's bad? It's wrong somehow? Things don't turn out the way they expected Or is it just me?

And once again, I remind you people not to take me too seriously as every example I come up with is fiction, and fiction doesn't equal real life (real life is scarier and makes less sense). And the title comes from an Alan Moore story (in that collection I bought) where an alien observer comes to a world where their species reproduces by killing these mollusk things. Hilarity (and death) ensue.

"Surprise" and "Innocence" - Buffy and Angel make love, Angel loses his soul and turns evil.

"The Song Remains The Same" - Okay, neither Dawson nor Joey were virgins at the time, but the first time they have sex, and it turns out Dawson didn't even break up with his girlfriend yet.

"Raincoats and Recipes" - Rory loses her virginity to Dean and, as a result, commits adultery.

"Mortal" - A powerless Clark loses his virginity to Lana (who was also a virgin), doesn't tell her that he's an alien, and is pretty much afraid to touch her anytime after.

Now, unless WB has lied to me in the name of teen angst (although most people on that list were in college and nearly 20 by that point), I can only conclude that sex and losing your virginity is evil.

And I didn't even get to Xander and Faith! But the point is, evil, evil, evil! I've been traumatized. I'm hardly in the position to think about having sex, but if I DO ever have sex, I'll end up losing my virginity (unless there's some way around that, which I doubt).

How is this a rite of passage?! Doing something you never expected to do, being lied to, feeling used, that sucks, man! And even WHEN being with your partner makes you perfectly happy, sex STILL ends up corrupting you and making you evil!

Thanks to Phantasm, I've still got Blake on my mind. And to a lesser extent Seamus Heaney. Sex is experience. It's knowledge, and therefore, it corrupts you. It changes you. It takes something away from you that you can never get back. From then on, you see the world in a different light.

That just sounds...I dunno, really crappy. I don't admit this about many things, but it scares me. Sometimes I wonder how people's perspectives are changed by it. I have virgin friends, I have non-virgin friends. I just wonder what this says about me and how naive I am about things, especially love and romance. Okay, I've rambled on long enough. Next time I'll try not to be so...ick.